If you are like me, you woke up the day or two after Christmas deciding you needed to run to the store for something but when you enter the store, instead of being greeted by red and green and a major amount of glitter, you are greeted with RED, WHITE and PINK!
Yes, in the mere 48 hours that it takes most of us to rejoin the real world after Christmas, we have switched colors, holidays and we are now in full-on Valentine’s day mode.
I think Valentine’s day is a fun little holiday. I mean if you are the age of my youngest, it represents the chance for a fun party at school that breaks up the winter doldrums and the chance to exchange those cute little Valentine cards to all his classmates (even thought I have heard rumblings of complaints that he has to sign his name 29 times) The holiday to them is about liking everyone maybe even kind of maybe liking someone just that little bit more, but it is in my thoughts the perfect holiday for the early part of life and even the early part of a relationship. For those holding a dozen roses from their spouse of 25 years right now, please don’t get me wrong, I love a beautiful card and of course CHOCOLATE…we all need to celebrate love. It is just that for me the pink and the red, the cards and the chocolate are like the fun, easy part of love.
But for me, the easy pink and red and chocolatey part of love is part of the picture, but it is eclipsed by the other kind of love. The kind of love that you simply have around you, the being happy that your significant other pulls into the drive at night, because now you can simply be together. The kind of love that you count on through all parts of the day…through all the years…through all the ups and downs. The love that is love but is a deep frienship as well. These things called relationships take work even under the finest of circumstances….seriously that whole toothpaste tube thing…roll it or squeeze it…can take some compromises. But then add into the mix a child who has special needs and then my friends, you have an entirely different equation. This special child and all their needs be them medical, emotional, physical or all those mentioned can take its toll on this thing called a relationship. As I was asked once by a new therapist. “Are you still married to Elizabeth’s father?” I responded “Yes, of course, why do you ask this?” She then shared with me a fact I did not know and that is the divorce rates for couples with special needs children is very, very high.
With this in mind, I want this Valentine wish to go out to those couples who are walking this special needs journeys together. The ones who can look to their side and see that special person right there. The couples who have learned so much on their journeys and can give support as well as receive it. No one truly knows your journey but you and that special person. I offer this wish out today…the official day of love and pink and red.
To my own special person…as we watched the Super Bowl and Bruno mars sang “Just the Way You Are” I looked around the room and saw my children and husband and was profoundly thankful for them and their love and then I look up to see John pointing at me and smiling right as the song said.” I think you’re amazing..just the way you are” I smiled and pointed back to him. Yes, thank you John for all you are to me on this walk of life.
Happy Valentine’s Day to all.